Is my 4WD okay?

[Xterra Mike]

If you have time remove your front hubs and re grease them. The grease is there is probably old and they aren't allowing the hubs to disengage properly. A hub that is operating properly will disengage after a few feet if you simply let off the throttle. Since out trucks and hubs are old most of the time they don't operate properly and therefore you must reverse a few feet to disengage them. The sound you are hearing is the hubs are still partially engaged and grinding. The noise will get louder the faster you go.

[BrewGuyTim]

When I had my '82 F-150, it still had the manual hubs. First sign of snow, the front hubs would get locked-in for the winter. That way I never had to worry about having to get out and do it when I needed 4WD.

In regards to re-greasing the hubs, sure. I you find an opportunity to do so, it should help them disengage a bit more easily.

Now, in regards to your wife driving it...Well, that's up to you to handle...

[TonyPgh]

Okay! Done Deal!
I took the hubs apart. There was old blackened grease that was runny on the outer bearings. The inners had decent grease on them still, to a certain point.
I did remove them, cleaned them out good, and regreased with lithium grease, and tested it out. Works better now! Thanks guys. I did notice the click when backing up about 6 feet.
But going forward now, when the hubs are locked in is fine. No more screaming!
The bearings all seemed fine, replaced the seals of course.
My wife....well. She likes the Xterra. And is a great driver, even babies it. She just thinks it cannot take any type of punishment, due to it being a newer truck. LOL